I miss Ecuador. I miss the villages of the Shuar. I miss the mountains, and the waterfalls, and the wind blowing softly across the water. I miss the smell of campfires, and holding the dirty, rough hands of Shuar children. I miss hearing the people say my name. I miss the faces that look so different from mine, but still feel like they came from the same blood. I miss the jungle, the river, and the abundance of rice and yucca I seem to never tire of while I'm sitting at their thankful tables. I miss the Shuar the same way I miss actual family I don't get to see enough.
The first year I went, I asked God to give me His eyes to see the people with compassion, just as Jesus did in Matthew 9:36. I was convinced then, and still am today, that the gospel will move like fire through the nations if we will just be willing to involve ourselves relationally with the world. It was my verse to seal my going then, and it continues to be the prayer of my heart each time I board a plane to the land I still call home.
Relationships take time. They involve a sacrifice of your resources, your days, and your heart. I love that God knows this. I love that He made that same sacrifice for me. I love that He didn't pay the debt for my sin with a check in the mail, but He came and paid it through the death of His Son. He paid it through a relationship that would make me a part of His family forever. And He did it, not because He only loved you and me, but because He so loved the world. He did it because His vision is always so much bigger than ours.
So what do you do in the waiting? What do you do when you long to see your family, but the resources aren't enough to send you back up that river? You pray for them. You pray every single day. You ask the Spirit of God to speak the name of Jesus in the wind that blows; speaking so clearly that the people long to know the Voice that calls to them. You pray, and you love, and use any means you can to let them know that you haven't forgotten them; that your trips are not a vacation to some faraway place, or a check on your bucket list, or even a "feel good" moment of short term mission work. You go because they are your focus in prayer, and the beat of your heart. And even if no one on this end really understands why you go, you continue to see them, and love them, and miss them. Because with family,blood is thicker than water, even if it comes in different ways.
